Crushes (Part 2)
Ok, now to go past a few others, lets say 10 crushes, lol, but they were minor ones that I really dont remember, let's fast forward to Nat. Nat, like Nat Turner that is, not Nate. His name is Nathanael though, but everyone calls him Nat. I might've talked about him on my blog before, or maybe not. Now Nat is 22 and will be 23 in Feb. He's a really nice guy, and guess what, I like nice guys! I don't want a thug! I don't want a guy that's bragging about how much he's got! I just want a nice guy! And no I don't think that nice guys are punks. I like nice guys and all nice guys aren't punks and too soft, cuz I dont want a punk, I dont want a thug, I just want a nice guy. But Nat is nice. He's another musician, he plays the piano. Now he started coming to my church here at my school like last year in the fall of 2003. He started helping out playing witht he choir, and when our organ player left, he had to step up. Now he came in August of 2003, I liked him by September of 2003, lol. He was so cute to me and he was really nice. The only bad thing is that he's the same height as me, which is 5'10-5'11, but he's very cute. Also I usually like carmel, brown, or dark skinned guys, and he's rather "bright" but he's cute.I liked him pretty much the whole school year. I finally admitted that to my cousin, and she was like "I don't know why you like him, he's kinda nerdy, and goofy", but I did. I've always liked the class clown, and yes he's nerdy, but I like smart guys, and he wear's glasses too! Glasses are sexy on some guys to me! So I guess my cousin talked to him, because she was the minister of music, our choir director, and she got his number for me. Christmas break was about to start and we were gonna be at home for about a month. She didnt tell him that I liked him, but she told him that my mama moved to the same burb he's from, and that I didnt know anyone there because I grew up in the city. Dang this is a LONG ASS POST! Oh well though, lol.....anyways...yea, like I was saying. OK. I called him, and he came to hang with me for like 30 minutes (ugh@that). I was so nervous about him coming to my mama's house, and i got the courage to call him after watching the video and hearing Alicia Keyes "You dont know my name" (thats my song) like 50 million times. So we came back to school for the spring, and I FINALY got the courage, and he was the 2nd guy I did this to, and called him and told him that I liked him. He left me hanging like Patrick did, told me nothing. So I really wanted to know what he thought about that, so I e-mailed him to ask because i was too nervous to call him again. I told him to be honest and not to worry about hurting my feelings, and if there was any chance for us or if he didnt like me at all. And he was honest. He told me that he didnt like me and that he didnt see us together that way. I still got the e-mail he sent back to me. He said that when he came to visit me, he seened me in a different way, and thought that I was cute, but he didnt see us being "together like that". I was hurt, but at least I knew and didnt have to wonder if i'd ever have a chance with him.
The thing is though that I still kinda like him! Aaarrrrgggggghhhhhhhh!@that! I mean he's gonna make a good husband for some girl someday. He's saved, goes to church, loves God, about to graduate, he's 22, he's a engineering major, he has a job lined up with John Deer, he's about to start off making $50,000 a year, I mean come on! He need's a wife! It seems like he got his self together. I still cant make him like me though. The cool thing was that after I told him, he didnt act funny towards me and we still talk. I was so nervous that he wouldnt talk to me anymore after I told him I liked him. So it's all good, I still talk to him at church, and he isn't funny acting. He's graduating this December and will be leaving after graduation to go to Iowa. *sighs* I'm going to miss him. LOL, I really need to get over that crush before I start sounding stalkerish, unless I already to. NO I do not stalk him! Well I think the word I really mean is Obsessed, but I'm not obsessed, I don't think I am. Do I sound obsessed? I really dont know.
1 Comments:
No, you don't sound stalkerish, but you do seem a little taken by the guy. I mean, from the male perspective, it's hard to tell a girl/woman that you like her...I mean, all the "what ifs" start rolling through your head. "What if she has someone? What if she thinks I'm wack? What if she laughs in my face? What if she gives me the 'I really just need a friend right now'?" So most of the time, I won't say anything unless I either just can't take it anymore, or I know that she is going to respond in a positive and constructive manner. It is a difficult situation all the way around. There is always someone who likes you, they just may not want to move on it yet...
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