I'm a hypocrite...
..yes i am. This morning as i was walking to class, since i missed the bus, this guy, a old neighbor of mine, saw me while he was driving and honked at me. He was turning the corner as i was crossing the street. I held up my hands and was like "You aint gonna give me a ride?" But noooooooooo, he kept on driving. He had a girl in the car. That made me mad. Not cuz he had a girl in the car, because i dont like him, but he didnt give me a ride to campus and i guess since he had that girl in the car he didnt want to stop! Ef that! I don't want him, i just wanted a ride to campus so that i wouldnt be sweating trying to get to class! I would've gave him gas money! He lives on the same street i'm on and it takes me like 30-35 minutes to get to my class when i have to walk. He know's thats a long walk to campus, but that negro didnt give me a ride. So i said "Dumb ass nigga, why he didn't give me a ride!" out of anger. UGHHHHH!@me!LOL why did i do that? He're i am talking about "Black folks don't need to say the word nigga" and i let that word slip out my mouth! Shame on me! *hangs head down in shame* It isn't like he was obligated to give me a ride, but when you're running late to class and it's 31 degree's outside, the wind blowing, and you gotta walk for 30 minutes, you feel that you deserve that ride. I've had folks i kow see me walking before and ask me if i needed a ride and i was happy that they asked and thanked them. If i had a car i would give someone a ride if i see they're going the same way i'm going or if it's not out the way. He seent hat i had my bookbag on and was trucking. I know he was taking his behind to campus. UGH!@him and UGH@me for calling him that. Lord forgive me for i have sinned, again. Sad sad sad.....it's because of folks like me that black folks wont get anywhere *walks away with head down crying*
Anyways i got to class late and my teacher and the class (there's about 8 of us in my playwriting class) had a pool going and betted on what time i was going to walk into the class. Class started at 9:35am. I got to class at 9:41. I ended up late and sweaty (ewwwwww). I walked in and my teacher passed 8 cents to the girl at th end of the table. There were different times on the blackboard, 9:36, 9:41, 9:45, 9:48, 9:50, on the board as to what time i would make it to class. Damn those theater people! Damn them! I can't believe they placed a bet on me! My teacher is an asshole, he's the whole ass! He's such a jerk...i mean he's cool sometimes, but he can be a ass. He'll tell you that too. This is the 4th time i've had him, and he's the only playwriting teacher here. He's like that with everyone, smh@that, so it's not just me he's picking on. And i'm the only black person in the class (you know that don't look good. Folks already think black folks are late for everything)! Was that some type of indirect racism? (lol@black folks always calling something racism) Naw that's because my a** is always running late for something. This is a problem i've had since like 3rd grade! SMH@ CP Time.
Father God, Lord Jesus, please help me! Help me with this lateness disease! I need to get better! With not being a hypocrite, letting the word nigga slip out, and being late! The thing is I really do HATE being late for stuff and i get mad if someone is late coming to get me and i have to wait on them or if i go to something (a play, concert, something on campus run by black folks, a church program, whatever) and it's starting late. I expect stuff to start ON TIME and not be 30 minutes to a hour late. But it's ok for me to come late to class. SMH. No i really do hate being late to class, because i hate the way the teacher looks at me. I really makes me feel bad. I've been trying to break it for the last 9 years! Someone help me! Sad, sad, sad, i know...
3 Comments:
Gabi....if you happen to post on here...the last 2 times i've tried to post something on your site it wouldnt let me do it! Just letting you know.
LOL! I understand girl - CP time is a mofo. Your teacher sounds like a real JERK though. Placing bets on what time you came in? He's a mess for that one. He (and the rest of the class) would have gotten attitude from me for the rest of the day. Humph!
Dayum...I woulda let some evil shit slip outta my mouth on that one. Your teacher sounds crazy..I'm mad the bet was only 8 cents tho!!!
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