Weirdness!
man...today around 6:30-7pm, i called a lady from church that's in my choir to talk to her daughter thats 15 about being in my skit for church. She's about in her mid thirties and she also has a son that just graduated from h.s in May that's i think 18 still if not 19. I called to speak with his lil sister, but she wasnt there....then he just started talking to me....he was like "what you up to tonight? where you at? i'm bored? i'ma come to the student center to hang with you....what time the bus stop running?"....i was at the student center studying...and iw a slike why is he asking all these questions...is he lonely? no friends? just really bored? feeling depressed? so i just talked to him, tho i wanted to get off the phone, because i thought he was just lonely...and he reminded me of my brother the way he was talking and how he was talking about how bored he is.......then he was like "we should hang out" and i was like "ok"...and telling me that he was moving to the old place i just moved from because his mom and sister are packing up to move back to Chicago, his mom is in grad school, so she must be about to graduate....so then we talk about church for a minute and i told him that he should come to bible study sicne i dont see him there often, also since he's bored.....he started going to another church to play the drums for them....but then he's like he wanted to ask me a personal question, but not to tell nobody, so i'm like ok, because i dont go back repeating stuff (writing this on my blog is different!)....but i thought he was gonna ask something about dperession or maybe about getting someone pregnant, or the worse case, tell me that he thinks he's gay or something....so then he goes on to tell me that he likes me and that he's been thinking about me alot lately....
ok now...hold up...WTF? i mean the dude is 18...and i aint NEVER looked at him in that way! i mean he's a cute boy and all, but i known him since he was like 15, since his mom and them joined the church at my school 3 years ago...it's just SO weird.....and he's talking about he like older women and that i got a nice body, i'm like wtf? he was like it was funny that i happened to call since he been thinking of me...i aint never had no thought that him or anyone else in church had a crush on me...i mean it's flattering, but he's just so young and his mama would probably kill me! and folks at church would talk! and he use to date the pastor's lil sister! he talking about he want to meet ot talk with me about it, i'm like i dont know...he kept asking me what i thought of it, i told him he was too young...he said age doesnt mean nothing and he's mature for his age...i'm like dude you 18 and i'm about to be 24 in Dec....it's SO weird....he said he wanted to settle down with me...man WTF? i only see him at choir rehearsal and church, i never really hung with him or anything, unless a bunch of us from church go out to eat, and even then i never really talk with him...i might say hey and ask him how school is going, but nothing else...it's just so weird....he like's older women he said...smh....i told him he better leave these older women alone....thatw as so weird! he kept asking me to keep that between me and him because he don't want anyone else in his business, and i will cuz i dont like folks in mine...but he was talking about we could date and no one has to know...man wtf? heck naw! how he got the nerve to want me to date him on the low....what i aint good enough for folks to know? wait that dont even matter cuz i dont like him like that, but still...it's just so weird...he said he wanted to settle down with me...settle with me, or some crap like that...i was thinking like "okkkkkkk.' this boy aint never sate down and had a real convo with me....he just think's i'm nice and like the way i look...and talking about settling down with me? WTF? i mean that's just weird to me...
maybe i'm just tripping over this..it's flattering, but a 18 yr old? never no one my age...either really young, or really old....no 23 and up guys! *sighs* so now this is going to be ackward...i really think he's playing a game...he asked if he could call me back later to talk, i told him ok, but i need to make it clear to him that there might not be a chance between us...look at me, all this time iw anted a boyfriend and someone wants to be it and i turn them down, smh...he said he liked another girl at church that's closer to his age, she's int he choir too and she's 19....i'ma try to hook him up with her...he said he thinks she likes him, cuz she kept smiling and flirting with him,b ut i dont know....i heard he had a anger problem too, i guess because he's so quiet...but i dont know, it's just weird...i look at him like he could be a lil brother or lil cousin...just weird....
in other news...my friend that i've been talking to told me some more mess about not being with me and why he not ready and have no time...he said one reason (i dont know which one to believe or to believe all of them) is because since i'm still a virgin and since he want's to have sex, he can't be with me....he says he likes me and was falling hard for me, but he can't handel the not having sex part since he wants my body" so bad"...that's what he told me...i knew that i would eventually run into this problem...i mean we make out and stuff, which probably aint helping...he probably get blue balls or something...is that the right term? but i dont know....so yea...am i able to date someone without having sex? i dont know...it seems that i can't find a nice young handsome strong christian man that's either a virgin or celibate......then i have a crush on a 32 year old man...lawd, he's fine to me....he goes to my church also, but he has a 14 yr old son...i've been studying with him in the library...he was int he navy for about 9 years and is going on the GI bill...he seems like a nice guy and he's celibate because he's trying to get his self together with God and have a better relationship with Christ...he told me when he took me to the store after choir rehearsal that women is his weakness andf that the devil know's how to use the,....so he keeps toh ius self now and try not to hang around too many females...he dont let too many old female friends visit him and if they do he sends them to the other bedroom, tho i think he should just make them get a hotel tho. but he's fine though, and he's tall, dark skin, very muscular, but he's a frat boy, UGH....mailto:UGH....KAPsi...ugh@that...but anyways, and he's 9 years older than me! his b-day is a couple days after mine, so he'll be 33 and i'll be 24...that's weird, but yeah, he's nice though besides that...but see i dont need to be having no crush on someoen at church because i'm not trying to be lusting after them, so God please help me! i really hate liking someone at church because i can't focus...that's just liek the guy i had a crush on last year, he played the piano at my church and i could never focus...so i've been trying to not have a crush on this new guy, so i can focus.....
in other news...i'm retaking the directing class i've talked about last fall on my blog...this is my last class i need to graduate, but i have my schedule full of stuff i dont need...i think i'm understanding it better, plus i bug the teacher so that i can understand this time around...we have a scene due in a lil less than 2 weeks on Sunday Sept 25th...i'm doing a scene from a Zora Neale Hurston short story called "Story in Harlem Slang"...it' was turned into play form by George C. Wolfe.....but yeah, thigns are going aight...i think i'm about to drop this English class that i dont need because it's too much tedious work...so i'm trying to pick up a independent study and a 1 hour class on how to use the library, lol....i have a test for my modern dance class tomorrow...nothing but vocab words, but i dont think i know them all, so it's time to go to study them, and it's now like 12:29am...i wore a dress today too, my teacher was surprised and this guy from church well the 32 year old was surprised cuz he wa slike "toya don't wear dresses"...i mean i do, but i just started recently within the last couple months...well since the summer...and no not cuz of him, but jsut cuz i wana be a bit more girly, and i have dresses that i buy, but don't wear...a few guys kinda looked at me, and one i didnt want was this old weird native american guy that be on our campus...he was staring at me when i was sitting at the front of the library, so then i decided to get up and leave....i dropped my notebook and he was like "you dropped something" and i was like thanks....i looked back he was still staring, ughhhhh, ewwwww!...anyways i've been typing for about 30 minutes i think, well about a hour, anyways, i'll try to update later, peace out ya'll!
PS...i'm sick of all you bloggers leaving! stay in one place! like 5 people on my list closed their blogs or something! sheesh! lol i can't talk tho, i barely update on here and type mor eon myspace at times...anyways, if you close ya blog, keep in touch, aight? the email should be on my profile...peace out! :-)
3 Comments:
Trying to holla huh? LMAO...I'll keep you posted
I'm more than six years older than my spouse, granted he wasn't 18. I think this boy is crushin' because he's talking "settle down" and he hasn't even had an intimate conversation with you. I'd definitely like to know how this plays out. Please stop by my blog. I'd like to link you.
www.princessdominique.com/blog
Awwww thats cute that the young cat has a crush on ya.. I'm 29 and got a 25 yr old crushin on me right now.. I dunno why I can't get away from these younger menz.
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