THINGS I'M GETTING OFF MY CHEST & OTHER THINGS...

alrighty people....i meant to write on this thing on the 13th and 14th, but i didnt and its 40 min into the 15th now, lol its feb. 15th and iots 12:40 am....but anyways ui've had this blog for about a year, and looking back, nothing has really changed....i still be on here talking about how alone i am, well i havent lately, but i am still alone...Valentine Day sucked! as usual....im 21 years old, and i have never had a valentine....that is so sad...but hey, its jsut another day, and like i said a year ago, what some boy told me from BP "if you was alone yesterday and you're gonna be by your self tomorrow, why stress over being by your self today (meaning v-day)" or something along those lines....but anywyas, these 2 links are links from a year ago, when i first started my blog: my first blog post , ....so i dunno, it doesnt seem like much has changed......well now im trying a pic hard to get more outgoing, hey today i dressed girly, trying to at least feel good about my self, cuz when you lookg ood, you feel good....but man....today i didnt do a damn thing...i stayed my butt in the house....i went to go out to eat, but it was too long of a weight, so i jsut got some food from Dominos and some choclate and ice crema from Wal-Mart, and chatted on Bp and in IM's like i didnt last year...smh so so sad...but i felt better this morning when my mama called me to wish me a happy V-Day....she always does, and i love her very much....she always know how to make me feel better, jsut a callt o say that she loves me...and i got a Happy V-Day call from a friend back home....and i talked to my best friend a lil later, and i talked to a few people on IM's that im real cool with, but other then that, i guess it wasnt that bad, its just another day........just like yesterday and tomorrow...even though some things might be a lil different....but man if i was to see someone kissing today i wouldve screamed, lol, cuz i use to always see that in h.s and it'll just make me so sick to see mofos all i the hall ways kissing and stuff....i guess i didnt like it, well i know i didnt, cuz i didnt have no one....and if i was inlove and had someone i wouldnt hate V-Day....but oh well, thats the weay the cookie crumbles...i have no one now.....but anyways im gone@whoever reads this thing, lol, holla! peace.....and God Bless....

posted by Toya @ 12:57 AM 0 comments

ok damit! i havent been writing on here....but i dont really have nothing to say...i think some of the stuff on here might've been a little too personal, some things might just sound like im complaining, and alot of stuff i wrote about might've been dumb and i probably repeated my self alot...but OH WELL, its my blog, :) ....

lol but anyways, the lets see 2nd week of school has past already...it is now 4:29am on Saturday morning...i should be sleep, but i feel asleep about 5pm on Friday and woke up at 10pm and been on the computer since then, smh, i have no life...but anyways i had cramps and took 2 Aleve and took my ass to bed, now im woke, but im off to bed again soon...but anyways to Mr. "You Know Who You Are"....you will see my blogger when im ready to like i said, it could be a week from now or maybe months, but who knows maybe tomorrow, but as of right now, you cant see it.....

ok, lol, but anyways, theres nothing new with me, im just bored, tired, hungry (well not anymore i did just eat some Cocoa Puffs), and i need some friends, im sick of staying in the house, and im sick of being alone.....i need to find me a BOYFRIEND...lol see im on that that again complaining about it, but lately i've been cool about not having one, im just going to wait, i prayed to God to send me a nice decnt handsom, smart, funny, tall, lol, young man, and hopefully he will, i know he will...but anyways i'll try to be patient, though im like one of the most impatient people that i know (well of course i know my self, lol)...if that just made sense, i dont even know im tired again, lol, but anyways.....

last Monday on January 27, i went to the Rec Center with my cousin to work out, our goal is to lose some weight, i dont know how much she want to lose, but i want to lose about 10-20lbs....i dont want to be bigger then 190 or smaller then 170, so somewhere in there, i was like 190 before christmas break, but i guess since break i gained about 6 lbs and now im 196, which still isnt too bad, i mean i dont look 196lbs....but that was the first time that i've been to the Rec Center my 3 years at this school, and i wish i went there before, but i dont like to go places by my self, and i figured that alot of people would be there, and i dont like going to places where theirs alot of people....but anyways, i see thats where all the guys are at, lol, see i couldve been got me a boyfriend out of there, lol but anyways i wont because these negros down here are lame, so i'll just go back to Chicago to find me a boyfriend, but oh wait, pretty much all the people down at my school ARE from Chicago, lol, but anyways, oh well i can just look at them play basketball or something, lol....

but anyways...my friend she says she isnt, i know she isnt, but something is sneaky about her and i think she is, (lol i know you are heffa!) lol well i think she's trying to hook me up with her friend or maybe not....but he just IM'ed me on Yahoo out the blue and he was about to get cussed out until i recognized his name off of her BP page, and i was wondering how the hell he get my Yahoo Im name because i NEVEr put my IM names on my BP page because i dont like for people to just IM me that i dont know, but i had my GeoCites link on my page, i forgot i even had that GeoCities link on my page....so we talked i gave him my AIM name, and that wa son i think Sunday night, well early morning on Monday...but we've been talking to each other about 3 times this week since then, and i usually dont just up and click with people like that, but i think he's cool....and he's a Saggitarius too, yea!! lol, and he's done with college and has a full tiem job, he's not out here like some negro's being lazy and not doing soemthing with themselves, and he seems to be doing something with his self, and he want to do better things....So Mr. "You Know Who You Are", im talking about you, lol....but one day he'll see this, or maybe not i might be a punk and delete it, lol, but oh well, im kinda feelin him, but hey i've only been talking to him since this past sunday/monday morning, so i dont know, he'll make a good friend it seems, but hey we'll see, and my friend actually kows him, so she wouldnt have me talking to any crazies, wlel i hope not, but the dudes she tried to hook me up with in the past, BLAH@them, anyways its 4:44am and its time for me to rest my head on my pillow, so Peace and God Bless and be Blessed....oh yea by the way Happy Beginning of Black History Month! and Happy Early Birthday to my Brother Omari!, he's going to be 19 on Feb. 2nd, thats tomorrow, that lil boy just dont know how much me and my mama love him, he's a knuckle head, though me and him fight alot and get on each other's nerves, i love him dearly....but maybe one day he'll figure out that we love him and stop thinking that the world is again him...LOVE YA BRO!

posted by Toya @ 4:53 AM 0 comments